Changes that every mom or mom-to-be should know before and during her first years of motherhood.
Are you living your first years of motherhood? Or are you about to enter the most beautiful adventure of your life?
Keep reading because in this article I am going to tell you things that you surely did not know about this stage!
Perhaps since you were little you dreamed of being a mother, playing with your dolls, with your friends. Making little houses with sheets (Oh, what memories!), or perhaps you liked another type of games with skates and street games, whatever your way of playing, today that moment came: the positive test!
Whether you have been looking forward to it (or not), it is there and from that moment on a whole world of possibilities begins to emerge in you. Regardless of how many things you have been told or how many things you have read, none of that matters because now it is your turn to experience firsthand all those changes that always bring thousands of doubts, among them, the classic "Am I doing it right?" .
But before continuing, I want to introduce myself, I am Dayana Oliveros, and before telling you my titles, I want to introduce myself by my roles because they identify and define me more: I am a woman, wife, mother of an 8-year-old boy and a 6-year-old girl and after From motherhood I reinvented myself professionally, I went from being a soap opera actress to becoming a certified family coach, speaker and menstrual synchronization mentor.
As you may have read, with motherhood I transformed and reinvented myself in every way, for this reason, on that path I decided to train as a family coach to be able to accompany mothers like you who are going through all these changes so that they can live with more balance. and enjoy this stage, and that they do it learning connected and synchronized with the power of their menstrual cycle (but I will do a whole new article about that later).
In this article I want to focus specifically on making visible 5 important changes that are experienced from the moment you become a mother and during the first years of motherhood, so that you take them into account and can contrast them with what you are going through or will be about to go through, so it may be good that you save this article for future reference, but first I want to talk to you about the stage that you will be living for several years.
The arrival of the children
This is the name by which the stage of the family life cycle is known where you and your partner go from being a couple to becoming a family. During this stage, 4 moments or crises are experienced: pregnancy, birth and first months, childhood and school age .
The importance of having this knowledge is that it allows you to become aware and locate yourself in what moment you are and thus have a starting point if you are having something that is causing imbalance, in countless opportunities just knowing that they are stages, moments that are your own of ages, or natural changes, bring me peace and restore my balance because they give me a starting point from which to move forward.
The arrival of children has a different impact on women than on men, although it may seem obvious. For women, matrescence begins, which is a term coined from anthropology to mention all the physical, psychological, and social changes that a woman experiences during this period. Basically a profound change in their identity, and for men, it is a stage in which a change also occurs, but more gradual because it begins to be felt strongly at the moment the mother gives birth and it is already visually visible. certainty of the human being who came into the world.
So let's get down to business, and talk about the
5 Changes experienced during the first years of motherhood.
I want to be very responsible and clarify something for you beforehand, and it is that not all women experience the same changes, or do not go through them with the same intensity. Some may not even pass them. This type of article is not intended to suggest, scare or predispose you in the slightest way, but it is the type of article that I would have liked to read before becoming a mother to take into account that what was happening to me was part of the stage and that it was not the only one. Sometimes feeling accompanied through reading is what we need to feel contained.
Let's start then,
Change #1:
Disposition of your time and productivity: your time is no longer yours and it is important to take this into account to accept it and not get frustrated. Start from the time you become a mother to establish priorities, simply the faster you accept this truth, the less you will suffer and you will find your formula. Sometimes the most productive part of your day will be breastfeeding or being emotionally available to your children.
Change #2
Your body underwent a metamorphosis for 9 months, don't pressure it to get back in shape in less than 2 months. At your own pace, always and throughout this stage, it is better and regardless of other people's opinions. Listen to him, connect with him and if you feel like you want to start with something not so strong, today there are many options.
Change #3
If you were not used to asking for help, this is the stage to learn how to do it. In maternity you need support, it is healthy for you and your mental health. Nothing more important than knowing who to count on apart from your partner. Who is your circle of support? How do you connect with other mothers in your same stage? The search for therapeutic accompaniment or coaching will also be valuable. In maternity, all those buttons that were asleep for years and that we didn't even know existed are touched, children are capable of awakening a range of unthinkable feelings, having accompaniment is wise and guarantees family well-being.
Change #4
Reach agreements with your partner since the relationship inevitably changes and will continue to change during each moment of this stage: talk about it before the arrival of the baby and talk about it during every moment of these first years. Make appointments, be creative, the children are here to stay for a long time (because the time will come when they will make their own family, but don't worry, there is still a long way to go hahaha), but remember that a healthy couple is a guarantee of a healthy family.
Change #5
Your identity is changing daily and you may spend some time finding yourself in this new version. Live it because the best time to develop personally is in motherhood. It takes time to find your woman-mother balance, to understand who you are now with children and how you want to be for them and that's okay.
There are many more changes, but here I wanted to summarize five (5) of those that I consider important to make visible and that are never forgotten to create a culture of motherhood that is sorely needed in these times and that guarantees a favorable environment for new families.
Today, given the challenges that are being experienced and the immediacy of the world in which we live, caring for the core of society from the leadership of mothers, is a guarantee of peace.
You can reach me on Instagram as @speakerdematernidad for more information and if you want to talk about this and other topics related to motherhood or the menstrual cycle or find your balance at this stage, I am available for any questions,
A hug,
See you in a next installment.